[Rhodes22-list] jokes

[Michael Meltzer]

Can you pass a third grade geography test?

Click here: http://www.madblast.com/funflash/swf/map_test.swf

 - from Sue Greene

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You Know You Are Thoroughly Entrenched in 2004 When...

 1. You accidentally enter your password on the microwave.
 2. You haven't played solitaire with real cards in years.
 3. You have a list of 15 phone numbers to reach your family of 3.
 4. You e-mail your friend who works at the desk next to you.
 5. Your reason for not staying in touch with friends is that they do not
have e-mail addresses.
 6. When you go home after a long day at work you still answer the phone in
a business manner.
 7. When you make phone calls from home, you accidentally dial "9" to get an
outside line.
 8. You've sat at the same desk for four years and worked for three
different companies.
 9. You work for Fred Frost and you think it's a pretty good job.
10. You learn you've been laid off on the 11 o'clock news.
11. Your boss doesn't have the ability to do your job.
12. Contractors outnumber permanent staff and are more likely to get
long-service awards.
13 You read this entire list, and kept nodding and smiling.
14. As you read this list, you think about forwarding it to your "friends."
15. You got this e-mail from a friend that never talks to you any more,
except to send you jokes from the net.
16. You are too busy to notice there was no No. 9.
17. You actually scrolled back up to check that there wasn't a No. 9.
18> Then you notice that there is a No. 9 after all!

Isn't this good???? And so true. But take heart....one day these days will
be known as THE "good old days"

 - from Fred Frost

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NEW YORK (Reuters) - Never having cleaned a bathroom in his life, Jonathan
Tisch was down on his knees, scrubbing with great effort but little
interest, under the watchful eye of his supervisor.

Tisch, the chief executive officer of Loews Hotels, a unit of Loews Corp.,
was one of several CEOs to get down and dirty for a week's worth of labor in
the new reality-based show "Now Who's Boss?" airing March 8 on cable's The
Learning Channel.

The grueling week humbled them, said the executives, who agreed to work in
lower-level jobs in their own companies, but it also made them affect
changes in the workplace.

Tisch -- after pushing housekeeping supplies and luggage carts all over the
Loews Miami Beach Hotel -- decided to change the staff uniforms. "These just
get way too hot. We need to change the fabric," he said from a plush
conference room at his corporate offices in New York. "We also need to
upgrade the uniforms to make them look hip and trendy."

Tisch, a third-generation hotelier, also decided to make some technological
changes that will reduce the time it takes to check in guests.

Representing industries from hospitality to cosmetics, the executives were
trained by the flight attendants, housekeeping staff and restaurant busers,
whose jobs they performed.

The temporary duties of John Selvaggio, president of Song Air Service, the
low-cost carrier of Delta Air Lines, included making sushi and disposing of
raw sewage. He also became aware of more efficient ways of time-management.

"I asked myself: Can you have caterers load an airplane, while cleaners are
cleaning it, while passengers are boarding it?" Selvaggio said in an
interview. "And I realized while working on the plane -- Yes, we can."

Selvaggio helped reduce turn-around time for planes from one hour and 20
minutes to just 40 minutes.

Song, known for its tempting and varied menus, sells food on its flights --
unlike most other airlines. The carrier hired all its flight attendants from
its parent, Delta Air Lines.

"Since flight attendants always served food at Delta, I noticed they knew
how to serve the food, but not how to sell it," said Selvaggio, who walked
up and down the aircraft aisle, selling candy bars to passengers unaware of
his identity. "I made a sales pitch out of it. I had a better time and the
customers had a better time. Oh, and I sold every single Snickers bar we had
on board," he said.

Larry Flax and Rick Rosenfield, co-chairmen of California Pizza Kitchen,
washed dishes, bused tables and made pizzas for five days each.

After a total of 10 days labor, it took them less than two days to implement
changes in the kitchen. First, they added two tubs for dishwashing, where
previously, all knives, forks and spoons were tossed into one tub. "Then
(the staff) had to put (their) hands in there and it was somewhat dangerous
and took a lot of time because forks are going one way, knives are going
another," Rosenfield said.

It was a relatively minor change, but one that speeded up the process of
dishwashing and made it safer. "We got great thanks and telephone calls and
letters from our busers around the country," Rosenfield added.

Also, after spending hours spraying and polishing the glass front doors of
the restaurants, the executives agreed the doors should be redesigned with
"a stainless steel plate where people push on them, so you don't get as many
fingerprints," Rosenfield said.

The series, based on the popular British show "Back to the Floor," has six
episodes.

Representing the lucrative beauty products industry, Dan Brestle, group
president at The Estee Lauder Companies, spent several days making, shipping
and selling cosmetics. Afterward, he suggested a two-day program to teach
make-up artists at Stila, an Estee Lauder cosmetics unit, how to sell the
make-up they are now trained to apply.

At Loews Miami Beach Hotel, housekeeping supervisor Sara Roiz was charged
with training CEO Jonathan Tisch to perform various tasks -- from making
beds to cleaning bathrooms. When asked if she would hire him as a hotel
employee, she replied: "We'd have to see if he can make it through the
three-week training period. Frankly, I don't think he can take it."

 - from Kevin Haggerty

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