[Rhodes22-list] Hey Slim, This News Just in from MN

[Steve]

This is a prime example of what liberal thinking does
to this country.  There is no other way to think about
Jane Fonda other than she will go down in history as a
Traitor to this country and the same can now be said
about the people that allowed that story to be
published in Newsweek. Anyone who think different is
just living in denial.  Facts are facts & traitors are
traitors.   
Steve




--- brad haslett <flybrad at yahoo.com> wrote:

> Newsweek Lutefisk Story Sparks Fury Across Volatile
> Midwest
> 
> Decorah, IA - The debris-strewn streets of this
> remote
> Midwestern hamlet remain under a tense 24-hour
> curfew
> tonight, following weekend demonstrations by rock-
> and
> figurine-throwing Lutheran farm wives that left over
> 200 people injured and leveled the Whippy Dip dairy
> freeze. The rioting appeared to be prompted, in
> part,
> by a report in Newsweek magazine claiming military
> guards at Spirit Lake’s notorious Okoboji internment
> center had flushed lutefisk down prison toilets.
> Newsweek’s late announcement of a retraction seems
> to
> have done little to quell the inflamed passions of
> Lutheran insurgents in the region, as outbreaks of
> violent mailbox bashings and cow tippings have been
> reported from Bowbells, North Dakota to Pekin,
> Illinois.
> 
> Whether the violence was triggered by Newsweek’s
> report of lutefisk desecration or frustration over
> chronic shortages of Beanie Babies and Old Style,
> one
> thing seems certain – occupying U.S. troops face a
> steep road to reestablish trust in this tinderbox of
> ancient hatreds and delicious dairy products. Some
> analysts say the latest outbreak represents the most
> vexing challenge to US strategy since its invasion
> the
> region three years ago. 
> 
> “It could be months before we get the area back
> under
> control,” said Brigadier Gen. Glen Hastings of the
> US
> Army’s Southern Minnesota Command. “We’re hoping the
> tractor pull and swap meet seasons will help calm
> down
> some of the violent elements.” 
> 
> ‘Campground of Evil’
> 
> Military efforts to stabilize the violent ethnic
> Protestantism of the region have had a mixed record
> of
> success. U.S. paratroopers first landed along the
> Iowa/Minnesota border in early 2002 to root out
> extremist Uff Da militants, followers of the
> charismatic Lutheran cleric Pastor Duane Gunderson.
> Despite fears of being bogged down in the harsh
> Mankato winter, troops encountered little
> resistance,
> save sporadic eggings from ill-equipped insurgents
> atop the grain elevators of local cornlords. U.S.
> forces achieved swift success, taking as many as
> 1,500
> Lutheran rebels into custody and bringing a
> momentary
> measure of stability to what has long been
> considered
> a dangerous Scandinavian backwater.
> 
> The initial battlefield victories, however, have
> since
> proven to be only the beginning of the American
> struggle here. The subsequent occupation created a
> number of difficult challenges critics claim were
> overlooked by the White House’s top Midwest war
> planners. The tipping point seems to have been a
> 2004
> incident at the now notorious Okoboji.
> 
> First constructed as a boredom punishment camp for
> Midwest dissident youth, the US Military Command
> converted the sprawling Arnold’s Park / Lake Okoboji
> area into an internment facility to house insurgent
> detainees. Almost immediately stories began to
> surface
> of prisoner mistreatment, including vivisections,
> anal
> probes by extraterrestrial strippers, and blackouts
> of
> Viking games.
> 
> American military spokesmen initially dismissed the
> stories, but several news organizations – led by
> Newsweek – obtained a series of shocking photos of a
> Texas Army Reservist, Tyffanie Cruddup, laughing as
> she humiliates a naked inmate by putting a Dallas
> Cowboys stocking hat on his head. 
> 
> The photos sent the Lutheran street into riots as
> far
> as Rheinlander, Wisconsin, and sent shockwaves
> throughout the media world. The incident received
> heavy play on network and cable news, the New York
> Times, Washington Post, Le Monde, the Guardian,
> Packers Illustrated, and was the subject of over a
> dozen off-Broadway dramas during the 2004 season.
> For
> its part, Newsweek ran a record eight consecutive
> covers on Okoboji, along with a special
> commemorative
> November 3 collector’s issue with pull-out
> humiliation
> poster.
> 
> Luting and Looting
> 
> In the wake of the incident, American military
> spokespeople have taken pains to defend handling of
> prisoners at Okoboji. A series of new guidelines
> instruct guards to “respect the rituals and
> traditions
> of our valued Lutheran prison guests,” including
> “dietary needs, Wednesday Nite Bingo, and twice
> daily
> viewing of Wheel of Fortune.”
> 
> “It is important that we remember that Lutheranism
> is
> a religion of peace,” said Army spokesman Maj.
> Richard
> Lehrman. “And we need to remember to avoid
> insensitive
> behavior and remarks that will cause these peaceful
> Lutherans to go on another bloody killing rampage.”
> 
> Despite officials’ claims of intensified
> sensitivity,
> rumors have persisted of continued prisoner abuse at
> Okoboji, including lutefisk desecration – an
> especially heinous crime under Lutheran doctrine.
> Some
> analysts have viewed the rumors skeptically,
> pointing
> to the Uff Da insurgent training manual “How To Lie
> About Lutefisk Desecration By Infidels.” Still,
> dozens
> of news organizations continue to investigate the
> charges.
> 
> In its May 6 “Midwest Quagmire Wire” section,
> Newsweek
> appeared to have confirmed the lutefisk rumors.
> Bylined by Senior Correspondent Michael Isikoff, the
> magazine cited an unidentified source claiming that
> Okoboji guards had deliberately flushed an entire
> batch of the pungent cod-and-lye concoction that
> prisoners had been aging in a specially prepared
> commode. “The guard smelled it and thought it was
> prison burrito night,” the source was quoted as
> saying.
> 
> News of the desecration spread quickly from Iowa to
> the Dakotas to Minnesota and Wisconsin, fanned by
> radio soybean reports and Lutheran clerics in fiery
> pancake breakfast sermons. Soon, enraged farm wives,
> clad in their traditional sweater vests and Disney
> jackets, had taken to the streets and begun a wild
> spree of destruction, overturning hundreds of rusty
> Blazers and Pontiac Grand Ams and hurling flaming
> Lladro porcelain figurines. Decorah was particularly
> hard-hit, as a frenzied throng of ululating Iowa
> women
> were seen looting needlepoint geese and rabbit
> tchotchkes from a Victorian craft shop. In a
> chilling
> moment caught on Army night vision cameras, their
> plus-size leader urges the mob to attack the near-by
> Pamida.
> 
> “Ya, you betcha!” came the chant of her enraged
> coreligionist.
> 
> After battling back the women with volleys of
> teargas
> and Land’s End catalogs, a detachment of California
> reservists finally quelled the riot early Sunday
> morning, and attended to the injured.
> 
> Fake But Not Completely Implausible
> 
> As soldiers patrolled the streets of Decorah,
> Faribault and La Crosse Sunday, Newsweek Editor Mark
> Whitaker issued a surprising, terse clarification of
> the original story, saying that the magazine could
> “no
> longer vouch for every detail of the story,
> including
> the brand of lye used, the number of soldiers and
> prisoners present, or possibly whether any of it
> actually happened.” 
> 
> Whitaker, however, declined to retract the story,
> saying that the magazine was “standing behind its
> essential plausibility.” 
> 
> “Obviously, if it causes thousands of native gals go
> on a berserk looting rampage, there’s got to be
> something believable in there somewhere,” said
> Whitaker. “Obviously, it’s now up to the
> Administration and the DoD to disprove these
> charges,
> once they finish cleaning up the carnage.” 
> 
> In a later and terser clarification, Whitaker said
> that the magazine’s anonymous source could no longer
> remember whether he had ever been to Iowa, was in
> the
> military, or knew how to pronounce ‘lutefisk.’ In a
> still-later, and yet-terser clarification, Whitaker
> finally retracted the story after revealing that its
> anonymous source was Kippy, Michael Isikoff’s
> imaginary childhood friend. 
> 
> “This is a really unfortunate accident for
> everybody,”
> said Whitaker. “But let’s not forget the real
> victims
> here – Newsweek, Mike Isikoff, and especially
> Kippy.”
> 
> While retracting the Okoboji accusations, Whitaker
> said Newsweek stood by the original article’s final
> two sentences, “Boo-yah! In your FACE, Chimpy!”
> 
> Despite the Newsweek’s humiliating public retraction
> of the controversial lutefisk abuse charges,
> tensions
> remain high across the upper Midwest. Many here
> discount the retraction as being coerced by White
> House “crusaders,” and believe that other abuses are
> being covered up at Okoboji.
> 
> “Oh yahh, I tell ya what, dere’s a lotta bad stuff
> goin’ on in dat outfit over dere,” said a young
> Decorah cleric who identified himself only as
> ‘Pastor
> Doug.’ “I heard dem infidels are switchin’ da
> prisoner’s Leinies with Schlitz.”
> 
> 
> --- Steve Alm <salm at mn.rr.com> wrote:
> > Right you are, Tom.  And only a little watering
> and
> > some fertilizer (manure)
> > required.
> > 
> > On 5/19/05 3:13 PM, "SVTRITON at aol.com"
> > <SVTRITON at aol.com> wrote:
> > 
> > > the american people listened and planted 2
> Bushes
> > in the white house
> > > tom
> > >
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