[Rhodes22-list] Jokes - Drum Roll Please

[brad haslett]

These just came in from one of my smart-ass female
F/O's.  Brad

--------------------------------------------------------------

It's just a shame the way women treat men. 
 
 
One day my housework-challenged husband decided to
wash his sweatshirt. Seconds after he stepped into the
laundry room, he shouted to me, "What setting do I use
on the washing machine?" 
It depends," I replied. "What does it say on your
shirt?" 
 
He yelled back, "University of Oklahoma." And they say
blondes are dumb... 
_______________________
 
A couple is lying in bed... The man says, "I am going
to make you the happiest woman in the world" 
 
The woman says, "I'll miss you..." 
_______________________
 
It's just too hot to wear clothes today," Jack says as
he stepped out of the shower, "honey, what do you
think the neighbors would think if I mowed the lawn
like this?" 
 
Probably that I married you for your money," she
replied. 
_______________________
 
He said - Since I first laid eyes on you, I have
wanted to make love to you really badly. 
 
She said - Well, you succeeded. 
______________________
 
He said - Shall we try swapping positions tonight? 
 
She said - That's a good idea... you stand by the
ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart. 
_______________________
 
He said - What have you been doing with all the
grocery money I gave you? 
 
She said - Turn sideways and look in the mirror 
______________________
 
Q: What do you call an intelligent, good looking,
sensitive man?
 
 A: A rumor 
 
A man and his wife, now in their 60's, were
celebrating their 40th wedding anniversary. On their
special day a good fairy came to them and said that
because they had been such a devoted couple she would
grant each of them a very special wish. 
The wife wished for a trip around the world with her
husband. Whoosh! Immediately she had airline/cruise
tickets in her hands. 
The man wished for a female companion 30 years
younger... Whoosh...immediately he turned ninety!!! 
 
Gotta love that fairy! 
 
AND THE BEST ONE YET... 
 
A WOMAN'S PERFECT BREAKFAST:
 
She's sitting at the table with her gourmet coffee. 
Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box. 
Her daughter is on the cover of Business Week. 
Her boyfriend is on the cover of Playgirl. 
 
And her husband is on the back of the milk carton



		
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