[Rhodes22-list] Puns intended.Humor, or at least an attempt at it.

[R22RumRunner at aol.com]

Those who jump off a bridge in Paris are in Seine.
 
A man’s home is his  castle, in a manor of speaking. 
Shotgun wedding:  A case of wife or  death. 
A hangover is the wrath  of grapes. 
When two egotists meet,  it’s an I for an I. 
What’s the definition  of a will? 
(It’s a dead  giveaway.) 
In a democracy your  vote counts.   
In feudalism  your count votes. 
She was engaged to a  boyfriend with a wooden leg but broke it off. 
If you don’t pay your  exorcist, you get repossessed. 
With her marriage, she  got a new name and a dress. 
The man who fell into  an upholstery machine is fully recovered. 
You feel stuck with  your debt if you can’t budge it. 
A lot of money is  tainted – it taint yours and it taint  mine. 
A boiled egg in the  morning is hard to beat. 
He had a photographic  memory that was never developed. 
Those who get too big  for their britches will be exposed in the end. 
Once you’ve seen one  shopping center, you’ve seen a mall. 
Bakers trade bread  recipes on a knead-to-know basis. 
Santa’s helpers are  subordinate clauses. 
Acupuncture is a jab  well done.