[Rhodes22-list] Reduce your federal income tax (political humor)

Brad Haslett flybrad at gmail.com
Tue Jun 27 23:45:18 EDT 2006


Bill,

You caught me just before bed.  Never ask me what time it is unless you want
to know how to build a watch!

English is the international aviation language. Kind of.  Every control
tower in the world uses a lexicon of 200 standard aviation English phrases,
except in England.  They say thing like "line up and wait" which means taxi
into position and hold, but you only know what it means if you've previously
been to London.  The Paris controllers speak to French airplanes in French
and to us heathens in English when necessary.  Not safe and very annoying.
The Germans speak perfect aviation English.  The Chinese are getting better
since our company sent a number of their controllers to Embry-Riddle (my
graduate alma mater) on our nickel.  JFK is perhaps the worst.  Non standard
aviation lingo, heavy accent, and big time attitude.  You know I was based
their once.  After a while you come to love the place.  I can JFK right back
in their face as fast as any one but it takes a day or two to get up to
speed.

Now here is a not so short story.

A long, long time ago in a far away place, I was a DC10 First Officer.  We
were flying from Singapore to Bangkok and then on to Taipei.  It was a short
flight, we were light,  had 11,000 feet of runway to work with, and it was
my leg.  Not that I was an arrogant smart-ass at that age or anything like
that, I made a bet with the Captain on who could make the best landing of
the day.  I wasted the first 3000 feet of runway searching for a "squeeker"
and the controller said, "exit wunway ah taxiway bwavo".  Bravo passed by
at about 140 knots.  The Captain took the a/c and I picked up the mike and
told her we'd passed Bravo and would exit Charlie.  "Roger, exit Chawie".
Only one small problem.  Charlie had a ditch across it about 20 yards in
that was poorly marked.  We'd already commited to the turn and you don't
spin an airplane the length of a football field on a dime.  I communicated
our situation to the gal in the tower and since nothing I said fell into the
parameters of her 200 phrase lexicon she kept auto-responding, "Roger, taxi
wamp".  Finally, out of frustration, I called a Laudi Air (defunct Austrian
airline) flight that had just been cleared for takeoff to park on the end of
the runway and shut the airport down.  All funny now but not when it happens
in real time.

Where were we going with this?  Oh yeah, English.  Spoken worldwide in
aviation, sort of.

Brad


On 6/27/06, Bill Effros <bill at effros.com> wrote:
>
> Brad,
>
> What's the status on making pilots all over the world speak English to
> control towers?
>
> BTW thanks for the sail tuning piece.  I've used a seat of the pants
> version, but I'm going to try this more rigorous approach.
>
> Bill Effros
>
> Brad Haslett wrote:
> > Bill,
> >
> > It pisses me off every time I go to an ATM or call a phone tree and it
> > asks
> > whether I want English or Spanish.  That being said, most cabbies in
> > Beijing
> > are torqued over having to learn english for the 2008 Olympics.  Here
> > is an
> > interesting perspective on native language.  BTW, I've ordered the
> > Spanish
> > for Contractors CD for the boys on the beach.
> >
> > Brad
> >
> > ------------------
> >
> >
> > May 30, 2006
> > My History of English-Only*By* *Richard
> > Cohen*<http://www.realclearpolitics.com/articles/author/richard_cohen/>
> >
> > To understand something of the current immigration debate, it might
> > help to
> > look at New York's Lower East Side in the early 1900s through the eyes
> of
> > Henry Adams, the great-grandson of one president, the grandson of
> > another,
> > ambassador to Britain and, toward the end of his life, winner of the
> > Pulitzer Prize for his autobiography. All those Jews sickened him.
> >
> > "God tried drowning out the world once,'' he wrote in a 1906 letter,
> > ``but
> > it did no kind of good, and there are said to be 450,000 Jews now doing
> > Kosher in New York alone. God himself owned failure.''
> >
> > One of those "doing Kosher'' at that time was my grandfather, Rueben, a
> > part-time garment worker and full-time no-goodnick who placed his two
> > boys
> > in an orphanage when his wife, Judith, died. When he came to visit, the
> > older boy had to translate for the younger. My grandfather never spoke
> > English and my father never spoke anything but.
> >
> > You can understand Adams' distress. The Lower East Side of Manhattan
> > was an
> > alien place. Its denizens spoke Yiddish. They were not Christians.
> > They had
> > their own newspapers and theaters and political organizations and when
> > they
> > rallied for one cause or another -- and boy, did they ever rally -- the
> > calls for reform or revolution were uttered in a foreign tongue. This
> pot
> > was not melting.
> >
> > Now, of course, the Lower East Side is the East Village and it is cool
> > and
> > hip and young and expensive. The grandchildren of those who did Kosher
> > there
> > have scattered throughout the country and the English their
> > grandparents did
> > not speak has been mastered and enriched by Bellow and Roth and Chabon
> > and
> > Ephron, not to mention Irving Berlin, if you are that old, or Jon
> > Stewart,
> > if you can stay up that late.
> >
> > The current immigration fuss has engendered more sloppy thinking and
> > rhetoric than any issue in recent times. The descendants of immigrants
> > wax
> > romantic, confusing legal and illegal immigration -- it's all the
> > same. But
> > it is not. My grandparents were legal immigrants. They came through
> Ellis
> > Island, papers in hand. It was easier to do so then, but that is not the
> > point. The point is that they broke no law and, as a consequence,
> > sought no
> > amnesty.
> >
> > But this anxiety about the fate of English and its importance to the
> > culture
> > does have its antecedents, although they are not, of course, exact. The
> > non-English-speaking immigrants of the 19th and earlier centuries
> > could not
> > simply get on an airplane and return to the mother country for a
> > visit. Once
> > they came to America, they usually stayed in America. This is not
> > necessarily true of Spanish-speakers, who can more easily visit Mexico
> or
> > another Latin American country. Still, the larger culture remains
> > English-speaking and its pull is like an ocean tide. It may take a
> while,
> > but it will get its way.
> >
> > In Los Angeles, for instance, radio station KDL shifted in 2003 from
> > Spanish
> > to English because the Latino audience it wanted -- the young -- was
> > increasingly bilingual and what's called "English dominant.'' English
> was
> > cooler, hipper and younger, younger, younger. Spanish was the language
> of
> > mom and dad, and nothing could be fustier -- or, in some cases,
> > embarrassing. The latter is why, to my regret, I peevishly ignored my
> > Yiddish-speaking grandmother, adamantly insisting she speak English
> > instead.
> > I thought I was being very patriotic.
> >
> > In New York City, the library system of a single borough, Queens,
> > typically
> > has the highest circulation of any in the country. That's not because
> the
> > culturally ravenous Jews of myth and fact are continuing their reading
> > habits, but because of a much newer influx of Asians. Many of them read
> > exclusively in their native language, some in two and some, sooner or
> > later,
> > in English only. The richness of Shakespeare's tongue, its
> > universality in
> > commerce and business and, above all, in entertainment, makes it
> > unavoidable. Few things in life are certain, but death, taxes and
> English
> > certainly are.
> >
> > It's reasonable, I suppose, to insist on English-sufficiency for
> > citizenship
> > or, even, for a driver's license. But the nation's so-called "political
> > conversation'' can be conducted in any language -- just as long as it's
> > conducted. The Jews, the Italians, the Chinese, the Russians, the
> Germans
> > and all the other ethnic groups who once lived cheek by jowl in
> Manhattan
> > had a vibrant press and raised the roof with their political
> > conversation.
> > Now their descendants rue, as I do, the virtual loss of a tongue. Henry
> > Adams need not have feared. I can read him but not the contemporaries
> > he so
> > reviled.
> > mailto: cohenr at washpost.com < cohenr at washpost.com>* *
> >
> > (c) 2006, Washington Post Writers Group
> > On 6/27/06, Bill Effros <bill at effros.com> wrote:
> >>
> >> Herb,
> >>
> >> Clinton forced these people to make the desert crossings.  Prior to
> that
> >> they would have "stampedes" where literally hundreds of people would
> >> literally overrun border crossings.  A dozen might get caught, but the
> >> other 488 would be home free all.  There were cars, buses, minivans,
> >> waiting to take them further away right on our side of the border.  We
> >> built fences in the easy places, forcing them to now cross in the
> harder
> >> places.  Crossing was a piece of cake.  If you didn't make it in the
> >> morning, you could count on getting through in the afternoon.  They
> >> would commute back and forth across the border.
> >>
> >> It's harder now.  We didn't used to have 100s of people dying in the
> >> desert every year because they didn't have to cross over the desert.
> >>
> >> There are more foreign born workers currently in the United States than
> >> there are Iraqis in Iraq.  Rounding them all up and throwing them out
> of
> >> here is not practical--even Bush understands that.
> >>
> >> I'm not "for" "amnesty".  I'm not really "for" anything.  I know what
> >> you're against.  What are you "for"?
> >>
> >> Bill Effros
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >>
> >> Herb Parsons wrote:
> >> > Sorry Bill, but you don't know what you're talking about on this one.
> >> Border crossings have been unbelievably easy for years. We taught
> >> them all
> >> well in our last "amnesty" program. Bring your families, you stand a
> >> better
> >> chance of being allowed to stay.
> >> >
> >> > Where have you gotten the idea that border crossings have been more
> >> difficult (except for the past few weeks, of course)?
> >> >
> >> > Herb Parsons
> >> >
> >> > S/V O'Jure
> >> > 1976 O'Day 25
> >> > Lake Grapevine, N TX
> >> >
> >> > S/V Reve de Papa
> >> > 1971 Coronado 35
> >> > Lake Pontchartrain, Louisiana Coast
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >>>> bill at effros.com 6/27/2006 3:16:16 pm >>>
> >> >>>>
> >> > Dave,
> >> >
> >> > Unintended consequences of making border crossings more difficult.
> >> They
> >> > used to leave their families behind and return home during the off
> >> > season.  Now that we have made border crossing more difficult, they
> >> are
> >> > bringing their families along with them, and staying North of the
> >> border.
> >> >
> >> > Bill Effros
> >> >
> >> > DCLewis1 at aol.com wrote:
> >> >
> >> >> Luis, PT, & Brad,
> >> >>
> >> >> This is interesting.  Seems to me that if the IRS has issued an
> >> ITIN  for
> >> >> legal and illegal aliens, and the govt also has a summary of
> >> green  cards/work
> >> >> permits/whatever they should be able to identify illegals
> >> pretty  easily.  I
> >> >> wonder what the problem is?  Or maybe, as PT suggests, the  govt
> >> really
> >> doesn't
> >> >> care - just send $.
> >> >>
> >> >> Re Brad's dreams: I think I understand what he's trying to convey.
> >> These
> >> >> guys are reported to be very hard working and conscientious.
> >> I've  met
> >> some
> >> >> and they seem like good people.  But there's another side to
> >> the  problem that
> >> >> he may not have observed.  Some years ago my wife and I  were foster
> >> parents
> >> >> for several years, as a foster parent you take kids into  your house
> >> until the
> >> >> adult parents can get their lives squared away.  Over  a period of
> >> time
> >> you see
> >> >> a number of "families" and kids.  We've  encountered what I'm sure
> >> are
> >> >> illegal aliens - ladies (kids are invariably tied  to the women) who
> >> came north
> >> >> because there are better social services and  physical
> >> infrastructure (
> >> e.g.
> >> >> indoor plumbing) and a government that will not  ask questions.  The
> >> ladies
> >> >> relating to foster care may have a variety of  children - I'm told
> >> that
> >> large
> >> >> families are a cultural thing.  Some may  work at regular jobs,
> >> but the
> >> ones we know
> >> >> don't, they subsist on the shadow  economy or mooch off one of the
> >> hard
> >> >> working guys Brad dreams about, or  both.  To an overwhelming
> extent,
> >> they subsist
> >> >> on the illegal cash economy  PT refers to.  These ladies, and
> >> especially their
> >> >> numerous children,   are a substantial burden (i.e. cost) to the
> >> social
> >> >> infrastructure.  For  example, as I recall, in Washington it costs
> >> about
> >> >> $12k/yr/student to support  the public schools - we know one lady
> >> with
> >> 5 kids and has
> >> >> not held a regular job  as long as we've known her; there's no way
> at
> >> all that
> >> >> lady makes any meaningful  contribution to the support the
> >> education of
> >> her
> >> >> kids - or anything  else.  I really doubt the ones I know of have
> >> ever
> >> paid any
> >> >> taxes, all  their work is in the shadow economy (i.e. selling
> bottled
> >> water on
> >> >> street  corners - turns out you can make a lot of money doing that
> in
> >> >> Washington).   The social services burden (schools, medical care,
> low
> >> income housing,
> >> >> police,  etc) didn't appear in Brad's dreams, but I think that's
> >> what's
> >> >> driving the  reaction to illegal immigration along the border and in
> >> Calif.
> >> >>
> >> >> One other insight: the prime driver to admitting illegals appears to
> >> me  that
> >> >> they are willing to work very hard and conscientiously at jobs many
> >> >> Americans disdain.  Basically, they are good people and they want to
> >> be  here.  But it'
> >> >> s important to understand that admitting these people,  especially
> >> the
> >> women,
> >> >>  has long term consequences ; they will have families  (large
> >> families)
> >> and
> >> >> the children may, or may not, be nearly as motivated as
> >> the  parent.  What I've
> >> >> seen is the children of dysfunctional  families, really
> matriarchies,
> >> >> fitting right into the underclass  culture that disdains any hard
> >> work
> >> and/or
> >> >> educational achievement.  This  is going to drive a geometric demand
> >> for even more
> >> >> social services   From my perspective, this is not a happy prospect.
> >> >>
> >> >> Dave
> >> >> __________________________________________________
> >> >> Use Rhodes22-list at rhodes22.org, Help? www.rhodes22.org/list
> >> >>
> >> >>
> >> >>
> >> > __________________________________________________
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