[Rhodes22-list] Please remove me from the e-mail list.

[Brad Haslett]

This is obviously not the only list with this issue.  My Bonanza list got
another one today.  Here's the new snarky response.  Brad

----------------------

If you mean unsubscrib e then to unsubscrib e from this group you must
 first purchase a Craft-O-Matic Adjustable Subscription Cancellation
 Unit.
The  unit can be obtained from most hardware stores and dental clinics.
 Be
sure
to  obtain the proper permits to operate the unit from the Nuclear
Regulatory
 Commission and the Food and Drug Administration in Washington D.C.
 USA.
Don't forget to recharge the money pump.

Be sure to carefully unpack the kit and place each component in its
accompanying mesh safety bag. Mount the Pershing DF4 mesinator on top
 of
the perforated Gerring Mach 77 refibulator and attach them using the
eight-millimeter torque fork. Be sure that the refibulator is mounted
 at a
66-degree angle and properly dispersed so that it is flush with the
 curved
section of the Pyrex thistle tube. Place the four sections of the
triangular separation gear into the posture cylinder and lock them into
place using the band-aid adhesive strip. Insert the wiggling pin into
 the
wobbling hole, making sure that it seated correctly. Place the D cell
battery and the eleven 9 volt batteries in the power chamber.

The device should be calibrated before operation using the optional
digital corkscrew accessory pack prior to operation. Insert the digital
corkscrew  through the electronic combustion service chamber using
 caution
not to touch the reinforced tungsten igniter control module and quickly
turn the inverter drive to 28.6 degrees. Turn the Craft-O-Matic
 Adjustable
Subscription Cancellation Unit upside down and hit the bottom plate
 with a
48-ounce ball-peen hammer while shaking the unit vigorously. Force open
the door to the incineration valve compartment and set the pressure
 gauge to
719 psi.  Close the door and seal it shut with duct tape. The unit
 should
now be properly calibrated and ready to use.

Before activating the Craft-O-Matic Adjustable Subscription
 Cancellation
Unit, you must first elevate it to a height of 229 feet above sea level
 to
insure that the unit receives the proper oxygen level and barometric
pressure. Point the aerial to 17 degrees north by northeast to within
 the
parameters of the Telstar GS-2 weather satellite and apply pressure to
 the
wing shaft on the southern most section of the modular accelerator.
  Using
the special ratchet adapter supplied with the unit, rotate the heater
 core
to the "on" position. The "on" position has been obtained when the
 green
light begins to flash, signifying that the red light is about to go
 off.
Once the red light is off, flip the toggle switch labeled "ON/OFF" to
 the
"ON" position and count to 47 before logging on to the system.

 Logon using your username and password and wait for the prompt. Once
prompted you must check the inverse hyperbolic cosecant function
generator box to obtain the nonlinear interaction between it and the
refibrillator so that the appropriate action you wish to
use will happen and then press the pressure release button and turn off
the compressor while turning the hand crank at 231 meters per minute.
 Next,
press control, alt, delete, caps lock, shift, number lock, escape and
 tab
simultaneously.  Press enter.

You will have one second to complete the procedure. If you fail to
 respond
in the time limit allowed, simply purchase a new Craft-O-Matic
 Adjustable
Subscription Cancellation Unit and start from the beginning.

Please remember that this is the only way we will accept for you to
unsubscrib e from this group. We have made every attempt to simplify
 the
procedure for your convenience. Failure to comply with the unsubscrib e
policy will result in immediate termination of your subscription so
 please
follow the above directions closely.

It's like Smokey the Bear!

Only YOU can get yourself off the list.

http://beechcraft.org/mailman/listinfo/beech-owners