[Rhodes22-list] Joke: John Cleese! gotta love him

[Bill Effros]

Doug,

Not really John Cleese.  Here's where it came from:

http://www.satirewire.com/news/jan02/axis.shtml

Bill Effros


----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Gardner, Douglas L. (LNG-DAY)" <douglas.gardner@lexisnexis.com>
To: "Rhodes22-List (E-mail)" <rhodes22-list@rhodes22.org>
Sent: Wednesday, April 02, 2003 11:12 AM
Subject: [Rhodes22-list] Joke: John Cleese! gotta love him


> (best if read aloud in a John Cleese voice)
> 
> Axis of Evil Wannabees
> > > > by John Cleese> >
> 
>  Bitter after being snubbed for membership in the "Axis of Evil", Libya,
> China and Syria today announced that they had formed the "Axis of Just
> as Evil", which they said would be more evil than that stupid
> Iran-Iraq-North Korea axis President Bush warned of in his Stateof the
> Union address. Axis of Evil members, however, immediately dismissed the
> new Axis as having, for starters, a really dumb name. "Right. They are
> just as evil . . . in their dreams!" declared North Korean leader Kim
> Jong-il. "Everybody knows we're the best evils . . . best at being evil
> we're the best." Diplomats from Syria denied they were jealous over
> being excluded, although they conceded they did ask if they could join
> the Axis of Evil. "They told us it was full," said Syrian President
> Bashar al-Assad. "An axis can't have more than three countries",
> explained Iraqi President Saddam Hussein. "This is not my rule, it's
> tradition. In World War II you had Germany, Italy, and Japan in the evil
> Axis. So, you can only have three, and a secret handshake. Ours is
> wickedly cool." International reaction to Bush's Axis of Evil
> declaration was swift, as within minutes, France surrendered.
> 
> Elsewhere, peer-conscious nations rushed to gain triumvirate status in
> what has become a game of geopolitical musical chairs. Cuba, Sudan and
> Serbia announced that they had formed the "Axis of Somewhat Evil",
> forcing Somalia to join with Uganda and Myanmar in the "Axis of
> Occasionally Evil", while Bulgaria, Indonesia and Russia established the
> "Axis of Not So Much Evil Really as Just Generally Disagreeable". With
> the criteria suddenly  expanded and all the desirable clubs filling up,
> Sierra Leone, El  Salvador, and Rwanda applied to be called the "Axis of
> Countries That Aren't the Worst But Certainly Won't Be Asked to Host the
> Olympics".  Canada, Mexico and Australia formed the "Axis of Nations
> That Are  Actually Quite Nice But Secretly Have Some Nasty Thoughts
> About  America", while Scotland, New Zealand and Spain established the
> "Axis of Countries That Want Sheep to Wear Lipstick". "That's not a
> threat really, just something we like to do", said Scottish Executive
> First Minister Jack McConnell. While wondering if the other nations of
> the world weren't perhaps making fun of him, a cautious Bush granted
> approval for most axis, although he rejected the establishment of the
> "Axis of Countries Whose Names End in 'Guay", accusing one of its
> members of filing a false application. Officials from Paraguay, Uruguay,
> and Chadguay denied the charges. Israel, meanwhile, insisted it didn't
> want to join any Axis, but privately  leaders said that's only because
> they hadn't yet been asked.
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