[Rhodes22-list] A little levity

[L. Sailor]

Thought someone out there might enjoy this.....

elle

Terror Alerts:

The British are feeling the pinch in relation to
recent bombings and have 
raised their security level from "Miffed" to "Peeved."
Soon, though, 
security levels may be raised yet again to "Irritated"
or even "A Little Bit 
Cross." Londoners have not been "A Little Bit Cross"
since the Blitz in 
1940, when tea supplies all but ran out. Terrorists
have been re-categorized 
from "Tiresome" to a "Bloody Nuisance." The last time
the British issued a 
"Bloody Nuisance" warning level was during the great
fire of 1666.

Also, the French Government announced yesterday that
it has raised its
terror alert level from "Run" to "Hide." (The only two
higher levels in
France are "Surrender" and "Collaborate.") This rise
was precipitated by
a recent fire that destroyed France's white flag
factory, effectively
paralyzing the country's military capability.

It's not only the English and French that are on a
heightened level of 
alert. Italy has increased its alert level from "Shout
Loudly and Excitedly" 
to "Elaborate Military Posturing." Two more levels
remain: "Ineffective 
Combat Operations" and "Change Sides."

The Germans also increased their alert state from
"Disdainful Arrogance"
to "Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs." They
also have two higher
levels: "Invade Poland" and "Lose."

Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday, as
usual, and the only
threat they are worried about is NATO pulling out of
Brussels.



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